So I've been meaning to post something for awhile now but I haven't known what to put up. Well for the last month the church I go to down at school, @NorthPointMO <on twitter> has been talking about the "smelly truth" of the things we go through but don't like to admit and today we had the last three services of the series and I have thought a lot through this series and I would like to post some of what we have talked about and try to provoke your thoughts too! Keep in mind this has been a series rated PG-13 by the pastor so as a whole it has been addressing more adult themes and as such so will this post. Be forewarned I will go where the pastor, @tommysparger <on twitter>, was willing to go and so please be advised that some of this may make you blush a little. The first week we spoke about a specific problem lust. So we will address this now.
The first question to be addressed is what is lust? The pastor used Matthew 22:36-40 to comment on this. Now this is an interesting passage to use to talk about what lust is because this is the passage where Jesus speaks about the most important commandment but I think the reason it applies is that lust, is breaking the first greatest commandment and making something else God. So then what is lust? Lust is using someone else or their image for my sexual pleasure. This is truly sick but very much the case for many people in the United States and in the wider context the world. Now someone might be thinking what is so bad about lust? Well simply put it is a destructive habit. What, wait, you mean lust is destructive? How? Why? Well again this fairly simple, lust is destructive because when you or I or anyone commits lust everybody involved suffers. You, I, whoever is commiting lust suffers because they pull away from others to keep this sin hidden, because of that you ruin relationships which cause you to suffer later when no one wants to be around you. The person you are lusting after suffers because in your head/my head/ whatever that person is being treated like they are nothing and because of that they suffer whether they know it or not. Now the next thing is that there are levels of lust, three in particular. The first level of lust is not engaged in a pattern or preoccupation of lust. The second is very much associated with guilt. Seasons of being very affected by lust and seasons of not being (this seems to be the common pattern). The third and final level is very consumed by lust. So then if this is the case for you, how do you stop might be the next question. For this we were given a three step process which may not quite work for all situations but is a good start and the steps are 1) admit you have a problem, 2) find out why you have the problem, and 3) reach out and trust someone. There is some beauty to be found in this very kind of a situation Hebrews 4:15-16 is a passage we got at this point and it is so very important for us to know this simple truth. This passage talks about how our "High Priest" is one who understands our issues and can relate to us because Jesus of Nazareth, the Christ, was tempted in everyway that a man (in a general sense not genderly, can be tempted.
The second week of this series we spoke about secret sins and the first verse we looked at was Proverbs 28:13. From there Tommy moved to speaking about two principles of secret sin which were: 1) when you keep a sin a secret, it goes from bad to worse and 2) confession is the healthiest thing you can do. So confession is the healthiest thing we can do? That is amazing but Tommy went a little further and said that there are two types of confession: 1) confession to God and 2) confession to each other. The last major point for this week was a five step application for dealing with secret sin. The first step is to deal with it today. This is important without a doubt because if you put it off the problem isn't going to go away if you put it off. The second is refuse to blame other people. Take responsibility for what you are doing. Thats pretty straight forward isn't it? This is definitely going to be one of the tougher ones to do because its so much simpler to say well its not my fault its _______'s fault. The third principle is to surrender to Jesus. But what if you are a Christian and still struggling with this secret sin? Just keep surrendering to Jesus and lay this burden at his feet. The fourth principle is to keep away from temptation. This one is sometimes easier said than done. College students, most of them, need a computer in their room to do their school work. Perhaps an alternative to this is to place the computer in a central location or to get rid of it. Those are options. Other options could be to have someone else password protect your computer for you so you can't use it unless they do or only use your computer when someone else is around to make sure you don't do something you shouldn't. This however assumes the problem is a pornography addiction and leads into the fifth principle Tommy gave us. That principle is get accountability and support. In running with the previous example for principle four there are numerous options for accountability such as x3watch, this is a free "big brother" program which reports your illicit computer activity on the internet. Another option, one which cost, is Safe Eyes. This program is another "big brother" program which works similarly to x3watch but on an even more advanced level, one which reports immediately and doesn't allow internet surfing unless the program is active and logged in thus doing a better job per se at keeping someone honest and clean because they cannot access porn and other illicit materials. One last note before I move on. These principles will work with any secret sin not just an addiction to porn but also alcoholism, drug use, anger, and so on.
The third week we talked about overcoming religous judgmentalism. That is how do we overcome being a Pharisee. This problem is a unique one which plagues many a church and many a believer yet it is one which I do not struggle with but sharing the details of our talk could help someone and I want to share for that reason! The first major thing Tommy said that really stood out to me was that "We need to be a church which has the heartbeat of Jesus and is a place of grace." I think this is so very very true! So then the next thing I'm going to say should go without saying, "Religious superiority creates a roadblock to us being a church after God's heart." This again seems to be so very very true. Now you probably wonder if this is the case why do mean spirited Pharisees go unchecked? Well Tommy gave us three reasons: 1) they are always in charge, 2) they are always paying the bills, and 3) they are mean. This spells out some trouble for the church in the form of a MAJOR image problem. The last thing we talked about this week are lessons from the life of Jesus about having a judgmental heart. The first lesson is I am no better than the person out there that I think has problems. - Matthew 1-5. I have NO moral authority to judge anyone. I should simply be helping them. Ya know, Jesus didn't just die for church people but for EVERYBODY. So, sometimes and make sure to read this a couple times cause a misunderstanding here makes Tommy, and I because I agree with him, sound like heretics. "Being a Pharisee is more destructive to the Kingdom of God than being a prostitute." I love that. It speaks to the kind of people Jesus came for when he says that doctors are for the sick not for the healthy. Prostitutes know they are screwed up and need a savior but Pharisee's they miss that point. The last sub-lesson to be had here is that real people have real issues and they need God. God is NOT just for church people and we are to help them. The second lesson from the life of Jesus is that God has a different perspective than me. - Luke 18:9-14. In this passage we learn that Jesus wants people with issues to come to the community of grace, the church, and to receive help. Now maybe you are wondering why is it that Jesus is so hard on the religious? Well its not exactly like the sinners get away easy themselves infact, he is probably harder on sinners than we think BUT he always calls sinners to a life change. Because, as I mentioned before, sinners know they are sinners but the religious deny that they are sinners. As a result, a large part of the church resembles the Pharisees religion rather than the life and movement of Jesus. The third and final lesson is that Jesus doesn't condemn, but he does call us to change. - John 8:3-11. That passage is the one in which the Pharisee's try to trap Jesus with the woman who was caught in adultery. There was one major "sub-lesson" to be had from this story Jesus doesn't hit people in the face with rocks but with the frace of God and grace makes life changes.
Ok, so. We have covered a lot to get to this point. Take a deep breath and step into the final stretch with me. Ok..1.2.3. Exhale. Alright so this week we addressed the practical application of all of this using James 5:16. To do this there were four questions to be answered why? who? what? when? These questions will put you into the position to begin overcoming sin which is trying to ruin your life because of it being a secret. The first question the why question, is pretty straight forward to be answered. Why confess? Because it is the healthy thing to do. So then consider the second question the who question. Who should you confess to? A spiritually mature believer that you trust. If you don't know one then try a counselor. But why can't you just confess to Jesus? Well because you need accountability and so you have to tell someone else so they can keep you accountable. The third question is the what question. What do you confess to? Well the starting place is to confess to that sin which you most want to conceal. This is because that is the one which is going to hurt you the most and so you need to bring it into the light so that it loses its power. The fourth and final question is the when. When should you confess? Immediately. Don't wait a month go and find someone you trust and do it ASAP. This can be tough but it will be worth it. So as you can see this series was full of discussion which if one applies it to their life can help you make a life change by working along side God and the Holy Spirit as they work inside of you to change your life.
So. In the spirit of what I have posted and because you are probably wondering why I titled this post "Confessions" I am going to bring to light my own personal flaws. I do not expect anyone else to do that here however, if you should so desire feel free to use this space as a place to confess your own sin where prayer can be given for you. My biggest struggle is that I repress emotions and I lack confidence across the board in my life. This isn't something I am particularly proud of in the least bit but they are my two major struggles. I have worked along side the Holy Spirit to overcome other things but these two plague me continually. I have never really been one to express emotion especially after a long series of bad relationships which ended with a near five year hiatus from dating during which time I evaluated those relationships from time to time but not consistently. Those relationships made me associate some level of shame with being vulnerable and as such I am now more closed up and need to get that problem resolved so that I do not hurt my girlfriend. The second issue, the one of confidence, is another one that I don't feel like I have ever really been. I'm not exactly a public speaker and yet I do it numerous times a semester at White House. When I asked out Amanda I wasn't really confident, fortunately she said yes and I am glad she did so very much. Well, this has been quite a post and I am ready to move on and infact have to go do other things. So I bid you a goodnight. Peace out. One love.
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